Let me tell you a tale. A Tale of Goffics and Preps. This is the story of Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. Let us start with chapter one.

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AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik)

That's seriously our first joke. This isn't a good sign.

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2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling.

SHE HAD HELP WITH SPELLING!!!!! Dear God All her friends are retards.

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U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!

Deprzzing? Do i honestly want to know.

After the authors note we get the Real story.

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Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!).

Who is Amy Lee? -Does quick google search- How did i not see that coming

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I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie.

So...Incest?

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I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white.

So in name only Vampire?

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I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black.

This just in:EVERY GOTH HAS BLACK CLOTHS!!!!

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I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow.

Woah You're not going to tell us everytime you change cloths right...Right?

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I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

Yeah stick it too the normal people who are staring at the freak.

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"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was... Draco Malfoy! "What's up Draco?" I asked. "Nothing." he said shyly.

So Draco, the guy who called YOU, Was shy.How...Expected

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But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

"Bitch get away from that man"

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AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!

No It was not good.

And so ends chapter one of the worst fic known to man.

You can post your own snark in the other thread. So, two reviews, yes. Two threads... normally get merged, if it happens.

Ah Thank you Grmbl