Check out this author.

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1989063/Spades_Neil

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Even if you are NOT familiar with Teen Titans, read it anyways! You don't have to be familiar with the series to enjoy the story I've written. I purposely wrote it in such a manner that you don't need the original series to understand the fan fiction. This was a huge benefit for me when I presented it in class, especially when I received such good feedback from people who've never heard of Teen Titans!

Seriously? First the fics in question are in the comics section not the cartoon. Am I the only one who would hope writers actually know the fandom? Oh yeah and his story is called Titans North.

For anyone not familiar with Teen Titans, Titans East is in New York. Titans North is Massachusetts according to the author.

Is there another thread for this topic somewhere? Because I find it hard to believe that this thread hasn't got any replies if it's the only one we have. Can't seem to find another one anywhere.

In any case, there was a new Zorro story posted at FF.Net today. The quality of fics in that fandom is pretty great, so this story immediately stood out because of the lack of proper capitalization in the title and the lack of punctuation in the summary. The summary also says to check out the author's profile to understand their rating system.

Okay, let's see... *click*

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hi i'm a teenager i love power rangers and i also like writing i currently have a lot of stories under my wings and will no longer keep count becuase i have written so many and i have a story i am currently writing on this sight and no i will not do two stories at once it would just get to frustrating my first story is done and i am now working on my second and for one of my fics i won't put on the site unless any of you know a site that you can put Rescue Heroes fics on, i wrote it becuase it was driving me nuts as i had it on my mind as i was nearing the end of one of my other fics oh and for one of my stories i accidentally put Green Astro Power when there wasn't any sorry about that

Ugh, some punctuation and sentence breaks, please! I had to read this five times and edit it in my mind to make any sense of it. Anyway, moving on to the other stuff. There are the usual copy-this-in-your-profile-if things. Nothing remarkable there.

Wait.

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98 percent of American teens would die if Ambercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. Copy this into your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your head off.

98 percent of American teenagers fail Math in high school. Copy this into your profile if you're one of them.

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sorry about most of the stories being on hiatus but if you read how many fics i have on hold you can see that i have a lot of different stories on my mind so i guess i broke an old rule oh and come fall i might not update until i come home from college on vacation it depends so i guess i need to get busy on my stories and FYI i have a lot of stories written down that may not get published who knows

Okay, never mind.

I won't quote the whole profile here, so you can go and try to make sense of it on your own. I especially recommend the section in which the author asks readers to report it to them if a story disappears or they forget to update. Or something. I don't know, and I don't understand how the readers could know that anyway.

Anyway, I started reading this profile so that I could get to this author's rating system. Since it was so important that they mentioned it in the summary, it must be vital in order to understand and enjoy their fic. And since the whole profile is written in that terrible, messy way, I got a headache before I reached the right part.

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from now on my usual rating system will be on my profile and that rating system is T on occasion i will rate it lower but never higher

..............

Okay, and this is important because? We can see what the rating of every story is without reading your profile, thank you very much. And the author ends up contradicting themselves anyway because they later explain that if a story is rated M, it's for action (and not some slash or something!!).

And yes, this person writes fanfics in the same style as their profile.

^^ Jesus, that's awful. I find I have a lot of trouble with brats making their profiles so long THAT IT CRASHES MY FUCKING BROWSER AS IT STRUGGLES TO LOAD IT UP. I wish I were exaggerating. It literally freezes my browser and I have to restart it (and I'm using Firefox, which is usually pretty good about freezing. Not so on FF.net. Even Firefox cannot handle the profiles). I really wish FF.net would implement a word limit on profiles. No one's profile needs to be so long it makes my browser crash. It's all just copypasta anyway.

This fanbrat, Wogglebug Lover, has a long profile in which she details how stupid Christians are and why her interpretations of characters are correct, while anyone who disagrees with her is wrong, evil, unreasonable, snobbish, mean, etc.

On the subject of Christianity:

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And now, in response to a question about why I like to bash Christianity in some of my stories: The answer is yes, I really do think Christians are wrong, stupid, and crazy for what they believe and I really do want to get out that Christianity is wrong and people are stupid to get involved in it. I am also well aware that I offend and, or, anger some Christians with how I portray them and their beliefs in my stories and I honestly don't care that I do because that is the reason why I like to bash them in the first place. I'll say whatever I want about all religions in and outside of my stories because I really do want to make the followers of them squirm and above all get them to say as far away from me as possible. Not only do I truly believe us atheists are so much more intelligent than any Christians but that we also have completely better morality than they do. Because they are just so obsessed with a thing they call sin and are so proud of calling themselves sinners that they actually become such, while we atheists do not even believe there is such a thing as sin and so we have no reason to call ourselves such or to be such. Christians are all also so much more concerned about a second life in another world and whether or not it will be a good one that they completely waste their one and only life they have just putting their hands together and muttering some random and completely meaningless words and phrases that have no power over anyone or anything at all. Atheists have always been making the world a better place to live in and we will always do so and kick the Christians sorry-asses off of it.

Some other choice quotes:

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4. Character bashing. This means hurting and, or, killing characters just because you don't like them. This is just plain wrong as it hurts those who love those characters and in a certain sense it hurts those characters also. This regards all the Dobby haters out there and I know Dobby dying is cannon BUT IT SHOULDN'T BE and anyone who isn't the least bit upset about it has no right to be a Harry Potter fan.

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10. Ripping off another's creativity. This means using something, anything, from another's story that was invented completely by the person who wrote it alone and no one else, and without their consent of using it. This especially means using it in any kind of way that would be unfair to them. Someone once tried to do this to me years ago. She tried to use the friendship which only I invented between the Wogglebug and the Frogman and make it into something it could never be and that I would never allow it to be. She was one of those people who like to hurt others to benefit for themselves who I hate more than anything else, and she has now realized this and it is my most sincere hope that she has now killed herself.

(Checks own profile first.)

I also hate profiles that force me to scroll while not saying anything useful.

Profiles are for linking to story illustrations, giving tidbits of news as to why you're not updating anymore, maybe a short paragraph about the type of person you are.

Copypasta is for facebook, or any other medium where each part of it is presented separately.

It's like an inverse rule. The more junk they have on their profile, the less-interesting their actual stories are. (Or something like that, not thinking too straight this morning.)

To all people who use profiles with nothing but lower case letters,

Please dear God, make use of the shift key from time to time. e.e.cummings is probably doing backflips and half-gainers(sp?) in his grave because of it and it makes your profile look like nothing more than how a kindergardener first learning how to spell would write.

=

Actually, snarky comment aside...why DO so people use nothing but lower case in their profile sometimes? I just don't get...wait, yes I do. Anyone else get the feeling that texting culture might have something to do with it? Where the profiles were just as hurridly typed up just like a tweet would be?

Oh. Oh Anne. I love you so much right now. She's like a big shiny ball of nutso with a ribbon tied round, and just in time for my birthday.

Come here little crazy, Mama Lapin's not going to hurt you....

My contribution:kaleni chan

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hi I'm Catherine! My favorite animal is blind, deaf, surfer children with ADHD and no limbs. MOST PEOPLE CRIED AT THE END OF KUROSHITSUGI(black butler), WELL I LAUGHED. I find tragedies amusing, misfortune appealing, and I despise when things don't go as planned.

Please, for the love of god, be a troll. PLEASE.

I stumbled upon WatsonandMary4ever the other day. She apparently loves my Elvish poetry, and wants to know when I'll write more of it. So, I popped over to her profile to check her out.

First, we get a warning.

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Hello, everybody. I figured it was time to put something in my profile. so here you go. I am 24 years old and I live in Ocala, Florida. I have lived here for two months. I have been on here for a long time and I love to read fan fiction. If you were expecting a cheery sort of profile with movie quotes and stuff, THIS IS NOT IT! I got bored with that stuff and decided to write some entirely new stuff.

Alright! Stuff. I love stuff!

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First up, I hate our president. Obama hasn't done much for us since he became president except get us deeper and deeper in debt and got us into a war we had no business getting into and he is only bringing a token amount of troops home just to say that he can do it. We stick our noses into the affairs of other countries when we should be trying to get OUR economy back up and running and get out of this recession we are in. I can't wait until Obama's term is up. We need a new president.

What are you doing ranting about politics in your ff.net profile?

At least the way that Obama had us interfering in other countries didn't lead to thousands of dead Americans and billions in military spending. Also, I don't know if you've noticed, but the other options aren't too hot.

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Secondly, our justice system is corrupt. Casey Anthony got away with killing her little girl with no more than a slap on the wrist and is now who knows where. She should have died. Our justice system needs to revive the old system where they just hang people, no matter what they are guilty of.

So, if you get caught stealing candy bars from a convenience store, you should get the death penalty? J-walkers would be executed? Share a few songs you like to a buddy on the internet and get hanged?

My troldar started going off at this point, but the fact that she'd sent me all of this glowing praise brought me to the disturbing idea that someone like this could actually exist outside of fiction.

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Third, this is about fanfiction.net itself. I have been on here for many years and I remember when there were no fangirls and the stories were well written and the support staff actually fixed issues. The Twilight fandom has created fangirls, and they are stupid, and they write so called stories that are badly spelled, author's notes, or sometimes not stories at all. The so called abuse team doesn't do anything about the stories that violate the terms of service and lets the fangirls run wild all over the fandom and pollute it with their stupid stories.

(Bolding mine)

Honey, I've been on ff.net since 2002. You've been on here since 2006. In 2002, there was plenty of fangirls and plenty of poorly written stories. At that time, I think it was the LotR and Escaflowne fandoms that were overflowing with fangirls and badfic. Oh, don't forget the Harry Potter fandom. There's always been badfic and fangirls everywhere. They are not unique to Twilight.

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I hate stories that aren't written in English. If an author from a foreign country is going to post on here, they should at least learn English at first, or not bother coming here to write.

LOL why did you fave my Elvish poetry then?

Also, ff.net serves people of all nationalities and languages. If you don't want to read any fanfiction that isn't in English, there is a little selection tab at the top that makes sure you only see stories written in English. I have a feeling that there is something else behind this person's wrath...

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I also hate authors without country icons. If they don't show where they are from, they shouldn't even be allowed to have a profile and post stories on here.

Oh, I get it. She hates everyone who doesn't live in the good ol' US of A, and she wants people to cater to her desire to discriminate against them.

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I have a very low tolerance for text speak in messages that are sent to me. If you send me a message, write it out correctly, or I won't reply to it.

That's a little extreme. I've had linguistics professors that type in chatspeak. If I ignore their messages, I won't know what my homework is.

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I'm a flamer and I love it. I openly flame stories and report them. If you can't handle it, don't wine about it and just leave fanfiction.net, don't act like a brat.

So that's what's going on about the whining and ff.net's abuse staff. She's revenge reporting everything that she doesn't like and gets mad when the abuse staff doesn't let her shit fly.

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I hate Twilight with a fiery passion. I hate Stephanie Meyer, too. She is a terrible author and needs to die, and the Twilight books need to be banned. I asked Barnes and Noble to do it, but they refused. Those books will plant dangerous ideas into the minds of this generation of young girls and they will become obsessed with Edward and they will form unhealthy relationships, or all they will want from their boyfriends is sex, and at an earlier age.

I would love to see the letter she wrote Barnes and Noble. If you ban them, where will we get such excellent snarking material? Also, I love how she thinks Twilight will make our young girls obsessed with sex.

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I hate fangirls, too. They are obsessed with Twilight and have stupid pen names and put stupid stuff on their profiles.

Kinda had that figured by now.

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For people who wonder why they are talking to me when I clearly sent them a review, if you don't like talking to me, don't even complain about it, because I will block you. I block people routinely now, and without very much thought.

She's not kidding either. I thanked her for the review and the message and told her that I'm bisexual, and she promptly banned me. Why the note about being bisexual? You'll soon see:

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I hate gay people. They are not normal. They will be allowed to serve in the military in sixty days. This is not right. I believe only straight people should be allowed to serve in the military. There are so many gay people getting married these days that marriage between a straight man and straight woman will probably become obsolete. Gay people should have no place in today's world, but they do, and they will probably outnumber the straight people very soon.

Everything about this paragraph is wrong. Just, everything. I could get into a rant for every sentence in this paragraph.

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I hate People magazine, too. Their editors are corrupt, too. They only print stories about what stars are cheating with whom, which stars are having babies, what stars are breaking down, breaking up, having affairs with, which stars are gay, who has had sex change surgery, and all sort of other articles. They only give token articles to natural disasters and tiny obituary pieces to stars. The royal wedding had a whole bunch of pages, while the Joplin and Tuscaloosa tornados barely got mentioned. I think they only like to put stuff in about what the celebrity gossip is that day and they don't care about the natural disasters. There was a four page article aout gay couples who are going to get married, and the editors only gave a token page to the people who died in Norway's shooting.

I don't know if you've noticed, but People magazine is about people, not news. What did you expect?

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I am finally free of the Twilight fandom and never going back to it. I wasted a lot of time on that fandom. To all the authors who want to write Twilight fan fics, go ahead, but I won't read them.

Aha! So you are a Twitard gone rogue! That's why you are obsessed with it. You must have been one of the Twilight fangirls that you profess to hate as well. You must hate yourself so much. Why not forgive yourself and let the hate go?

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This concludes my new profile. Have a nice night.

I plan to. My nice nights involve speaking in foreign languages, writing a little lesbian vampire porn, cuddling with my hubby, and Greek yogurt.

Looking at your 5000+ fav'd fanfics and authors, I'm guessing that your night will be spent crouched before your computer, reading badfic, and fapping to Rick Perry's "Strong" ad.

I bet her little brain would explode if I told her I was Asexual.

Oh, nothing against the hot gay sex.
It is just that it is not possible for gay couples to conceive or for men to give birth unassisted.
Thats about the only thing I can think of that gay couples cannot do just as well/better than straight ones.

Adopted by the good gay marriages? Remember, there are no heterosexual marriages anymore because gay sex is so awesome.

But the gay marriages will turn all the children gay (because that's how sexuality works) and then there will be no babies (because being gay means you're physically unable to have sex with the opposite gender and bisexuality etc doesn't exist) and the human race will die out! I'm on WatsonAndMary4Ever's side, man!


ETA: With a name like "WatsonAndMary4Ever" (who're they btw?) what exactly does she count as a stupid pen name...?

YES CHRIS HE HAS

YOU SHOULD EMAIL HIM IMMEDIATELY TO THAT EFFECT AND BE SURE TO COPY AND PASTE THE CONVERSATIONS HERE

QUICK QUICK HE'S COMMITTING MORE CULTURAL ASSAULT AGAINST THINGS YOU LOVE